Saturday, June 6, 2009

And People Think I'm Insane

I'm freaking out because I'm all alone in the house and the hall light came on by itself. There's no reason it should have done that. I am really afraid. I keep looking behind me....and calling out to seemingly nothing. I'm not crazy....something had to have turned the damn thing on.

I feel better. My dad's home now. He may be a dick...but he's a human dick.

That was wrong...lol.

So my stomach is constantly pointing out in odd angles. I woke up this morning and there was this huge lump on the right side of my belly. It looked like he was about to pop out through my stomach. I know thats impossible, but when you're pregnant you start to question what's actually possible anymore. Lord knows I never thought my stomach...let alone my uterus....could stretch out like this. And it doesn't hurt. i thought it would feel like an alien growing inside of you....but you actually don't feel anything at all. You see it, but you don't actually feel anything growing. It's weird as hell.

I'm absolutely positive that I'll be giving birth within the next two weeks. i will NOT make it to the 6th of July. Eric and I had sex twice today. And I feel bad because the doctor said my cervix was open and I think he's just gonna fall out of me. The first time today was nice and slow...and AMAZING. The second time, Eric was high and the sex went to his head and he pretty much forgot to take it slow. And it felt good so I didn't stop him. I feel like he's gonna hate us for that. Look...he just kicked the shit outta me. I can't believe this time has passed so fucking quickly. It seems like I just found out I was pregnant. I still don't have a crib. I need $30 and I'll be able to get it. I think I'll just break down and ask my mom. I hate having to ask her for stuff. I know she doesn't mind, but still. I'm an independent soul.

Ah well.

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